It was the month of July. Many years ago I was made to study in a school in which I didn’t particularly want to at that point in time. The reason of my going there… my family. My family made me study at that school, away from existing relations, friends and everything else. Nonetheless I went there, spent a good two years, created good relations with people and ended up with a different experience, both in life and on my profile.
However, not all was merry. The first few weeks were difficult to adjust and accommodate. I always had a feeling in mind to run away from the place. I used to think that I will disappear within the first three months. That I will come back home, go away to some other place or do something else altogether. That particular time had a deep psychological impact on my mind that I began to detest my own family for making me do this. I used to sit idle, reminisce on the days of the past and contemplate about my own decision and the fact that I accepted something which wasn’t my choice.
There were times when I used to question everything… my existence within my family, why I was born at this particular place, my own beliefs and a lot more.
Post this it took me a significant amount of time to get back to peace within my own mind.
The Equation of Life
Are you now or have you faced a similar situation where you had to do something you didn’t want to? Did it happen because of some people close to you? Did you begin to have feelings of dislike towards them as a result?
While I was pondering over this incident and discussing with some friends, the thought of life as depicted in the form of an Equation came to me.
Each living, non-living, physical, non-physical and any other being that ever had existence or is still in existence on the planet and beyond the realms of our mother Earth can be depicted in an equation called as the Equation of Life.
The Beginnings of the Equation – The X Factor (The Self)
Let’s see what this Equation looks life in simplicity:
Here, all the above Xi or the X factors are the humans, animals, birds, plants, trees and all other millions and billions of living or non-living beings in existence on the planet and beyond. You and I and everyone we know, our lives are the Xi in the Equation of Life.
We live our lives as if it is in our control, we are the masters of our own destiny, we are the creators and destroyers of our own paths. The X factor or the Self factor is the part of the Equation which is completely in our hands. The time that I dedicate to my blog, to my family, to my work, to myself, to my relations… All the things that are in my hands comprise of my Self or my X factor. The same goes for you and everyone else.
The Divinity Factor
Every single one of us is born in a certain set of conditions. Some of us are born poor, some rich. Some are born in a violent family, some a happy one, some without a family at all. Some of us have seen millions of dollars since childhood. Some haven’t even gotten the chance to sleep on a bed. Some of us don’t work till 25 while some are forced to work at 5. Merely by the fact that I was born in a particular family and that my parents were able to give me a certain kind of education has shaped the direction of my life. This was something beyond my control. This is what I call as the Divinity Factor or the Y factor of the Equation.
With the addition of this Y factor, here is what the Equation like now:
The X part of the equation is totally in the hands of the individual, what he/she makes of it. The Y is the part which is not in anybody’s control and has been ‘given’ to them by very virtue of their birth. The Y governs the whether one child is born in the form of a king or in the form of a pauper. The Y governs whether a being is to be born as a deer to be eaten by a tiger or a grass to be eaten by the deer. The Y governs the kind of friends you meet at school, the kind of friends you get closer to, the kind of relationships you have, the kind of teachers that affect you, the kind of mentors you come across, all those déjà vu moments and everything else which looks seemingly unexplainable at or after the time they happen.
We may also name this Divinity Factor as luck, fate, destiny, or by any other word with similar meaning.
As for the question how and by whom does Y come and on what basis it is ‘given’, I can’t say.
As already discussed, there is a Divinity Factor for each one of us which governs the start of our journey of this particular life. The third part of the equation is the weight of the X and the Y factors.
Every individual has that inner strength to begin with. With more resources at hand, it is easier to achieve more and do more things simply because resources make sure that I won’t starve even at times when I am not earning anything. If given a choice, it is always better to be born rich with more means at hand rather than to be born poor. The weights of existence are heavy for people born with a silver spoon rather than for people born without.
What they do with those weights and how they utilize them is totally in their hands, the X.
The equation, adding the weights now becomes:
where the sum of weights, in mathematical terms, is 1, i.e.
Each individual has a weight of their Divinity Factor (Wyi), by virtue of being born in a certain family. The rich are born with heavier weights, the middle class with relatively heavy weights and the lower class with lighter weights of the Divinity Factor.
Similarly, each individual is also born with weights of their Self Factor by virtue of the body composition, the intellect, the sensory organs, the calculative ability, the creative ability, the imaginative ability and a lot of other similar factors.
The Z Factor
Wondering what the right hand side of the equation is? What could that Z be which balances the entire Equation of Life?
Well, I have a reason to believe that it is the purpose of all existence. It is the reason why we all are here. It is the goal of the game that is being played, the meaning of life. It is the place where the creator of the equation is sitting, enjoying the equation! It is the 42 of life. It is the place where all the Y factors are coming from. It is the place where the weights of the X and Y factors are getting defined, with one singular goal to balance the equation.
The Idea of Control
So in this entire Equation of Life, what is in my control? Am I completely powerless or is there anything that is in my hands? What is that one thing that I can do and make effort to add value to it?
There is an extremely important aspect of the Equation which is the Self or the X factor. It is that factor which is in my total control. It is that factor which is completely in my hands. It is that factor which is me.
I have no control over who I would end up meeting when. I have no control over whether the person will be trustworthy or deceptive. I have no control over the uncertainties of the future. All that is the Y factor of each moment.
What is in my control at all times is what I do with the resources that I have. I am born in a family, that’s my Y factor. That was not in my control. What’s in my control is whether I am embracing it and living with it happily and taking the Equilibrium to the positive side or fighting with it, within and without, and affecting the Equilibrium on the negative side.
Someone I trusted end up hurting my feelings, something which was not in my hands but in theirs. For me, it was the Y factor, not in my control. What’s in my control is whether I cry over it and get hurt and affected by it or whether I see it as a part of the Equation, yet another one of the ways of the Y factor to teach me something and move on with it.
At all times, all that is in my hands is my own actions. All that is in my hands is what I do with the time I have been given in this life. All that is in my hands is whether I am choosing to be submissive to another’s desires or whether I am doing the things I want to.
The only thing that is in control is the Self. Embrace the X. That is the only way to understand the Y and the eventually perhaps the Z.